I had a terrible time in one of my classes last week and I am still very disappointed, sad and disillusioned by the experience.
It used to be one of my favourite classes because I would be so relaxed and happy during class, knowing that most of them would listen attentively. I viewed them as highly motivated students who had self discipline and I had such an enjoyable time teaching them.
Things slowly changed.
I am disappointed and angry.
I am disappointed because it is without a doubt that some of the students did not do the work given and that was despite the fact that I had reminded them I would be going through with them during that lesson. Some of them were chatting among themselves although they were already being punished.
I am angry because so many of them still think that it is my fault that I gave marching orders to those who are not interested in my lessons and there is no reason why I should be so angry. If they think that I was being unfair and unreasonable then who will be fair and reasonable to me? Have they ever thought of the times I still marked their assignments even though they handed so late? Have I ever issued cards to them because they failed to hand in their work?
Is it wrong to expect my students to do their work so I can go through with them? Is it then fair to me to be angry with me for something that they had not done right? Why am I condemned by my students who did not even do their part right?
What broke my heart was at the end of the lesson, one of my mentees flung the bag on her shoulders and stomped out of the class right in front of me angrily. She was one of those who was asked to stand because she did not complete her work. Why should she be angry with me when she did not do her work? At the end of the day, it was the students who were not in my class who asked if I was alright instead and the students involved did not even utter a word to me.No doubt my lessons are not the most interesting all the time but at least I can answer to myself that I have taken time to source for teaching materials and prepare notes when necessary. There is no reason why I should not be upset when my students do not complete their work. As a student, can you answer to yourself and say that you have tried your best as a student? I think I have failed as a teacher and mentor because I have failed to even teach my students what respect and humility are. If they know what these two values truly represent, I would not be treated in this manner.
